Often times, I find myself comparing my life to someone else’s. This can range from Beyonce to someone I went to High School with or to some random person I find on Facebook. I have no idea why I do this, but it can be pretty upsetting sometimes. That quote that says “You have the same number of hours in a day as Beyonce” is kind of like a slap in the face to anyone who isn’t nearly as successful as her. Maybe I am being sensitive and slightly pessimistic, if I looked at it in a more positive light I could see the quote as inspirational instead, but I digress.We can’t all be superstars people, it just wouldn’t work. And I am ok with that, don’t get me wrong. But I can’t help it, when I am watching a documentary on some average person turning into this huge star I start to think, why not me? Not that I want to be famous, yuck, no. But I do want to be successful and happy.
I think success can be measured or determined in different ways for different people, one person’s idea of success isn’t necessarily the same for me. Success to me can happen in different ways. In my opinion I will be successful when I am doing something that makes me happy, when I am more than financially stable, and I am able to provide for children that I hope to have one day. But those can all be broken down into subcategories of expectations that must also be reached. An example would be; I want to do something that makes me happy, but that is only possible if I am my own boss, doing something creative and worthy, and it should allow me the ability to go out and experience life. So to say that I have a set idea of what I want in life is simply not true. I think there are many ways that my life can turn out, that I can consider successful and that will make me happy.
For me the issue is getting there, and the worst thing I can do as I reach for my goals is to compare myself to someone else. The quote “Comparison is the Thief of Joy” really resonates with me. And important part of becoming successful and getting to that point in life where you are proud of what you’ve accomplished is the journey to get there. And if I am busy comparing myself to someone who already has things in there life that I currently believe I need in my life to be happy, pop, there goes my joy. And it doesn’t matter their circumstances or their journey, I just think, “They have what I want, what am I doing wrong?”.
I’ve been this way since I was a little girl. Back then it was little things like, wanting someone else’s hair, wishing I could wear makeup like so and so, or going to a friend’s house and wishing I had a home as big as her’s or as many barbies as she did. Is this something I was just born with? Is it just a human thing? I don’t know, but it is completely unfair to do this to myself. So I have decided that this is something I really want to stop doing. I want to enjoy my life, enjoy my 20’s even if they turn out to be the toughest years of my life. I want to look back and be able to say that even in hard times I managed to make the most out of life.
I want to be happy for other’s who have reached their goals, and know that as long as I am reaching for mine it will happen for me when it is meant to be. The journey to success is different for everyone, different lessons must be learned, and different goals are being reached.
Do you find yourself dealing with similar emotions when you are having trouble reaching your goals? Share your thoughts in the comments below!